Make Room For the Pain
by dollparts17
Summary: A year and a half out of prison, Piper and Alex work on keeping their relationship together following a major mistake by Alex.
1. Chapter 1

The aroma of fresh greens, sauteed in garlic and butter filled Piper's nose as she unlocked the heavy loft door. She stood for a moment, keys in hand, eyes slightly close and breathed. She only came out of her trance like state by a low, husky voice that called out.

"Pipes? Hey, get your ass in here woman!" Her throaty laugh followed. Piper walked into the spacious kitchen to find Alex bent over the gas stove, adding some wine from a bottle of Merlot into a pot full of mussels. Her dark hair was held firmly back with a pair of glasses.

Piper slipped off her heels and tried to sneak her way behind Alex for a surprise kiss. Alex turned at the same moment and grabbed her, easily lifting her off her feet. Piper let out a surprised gasp and giggle as Alex slowly let her down. Their bodies slid against each other softly. Alex bent slightly to reach Piper's lips and kissed her softly, playfully nibbling her bottom lip.

"It's good to see you too." Piper said and flashed a sweet smile.

"Ugh, I've been slaving away all night, making you this exquisite dinner and now I just want to let it all burn and take you on the counter." She raised an eyebrow, waiting for Piper to oblige.

"Mm, but it smells so good. I haven't eaten all day. You know I live for your nights off so I can come home to your cooking." Alex gently backed Piper against the black granite kitchen island and ran her long fingers slowly down Piper's neck to a button on her shirt. Piper let her continue to the middle of her shirt then grabbed her hands.

"Vause...behave." Alex smirked and returned to the stove.

"Well at least get out of those work clothes and come keep me company while I finish." She sprinkled some herbs here and there into various pots.

Piper went into the large open space of the loft that served as the bedroom. Their dueted art pieces hung on the walls, Alex's hard brush strokes mingled with Piper's soft wisps of color. She changed quickly into her usual shorts and the first t-shirt she randomly grabbed from Alex's drawer. She took down her hair and went into the bathroom to wash her face free from make-up. She moved back into the bedroom and sat on the edge of the bed, flexing her feet and rolling her shoulders. It had been a long day of staring at appeals and phone calls.

"You look worn out, Pipes." Alex was suddenly standing near the bed.

"I'm not used to being so busy. Lots of cases with the potential to be appealed. My eyes feel like they're sticking to the inside of my lids." Alex climbed onto the bed behind her and began to massage her shoulders. Piper let out a long sigh and started to relax.

"You're working too hard. We should skip town for a while. I see white sand and nude beaches. What do you think?" Piper sighed again and leaned back into Alex's chest. Alex wrapped her arms around her and kissed her neck softly.

"You know I have to head back upstate in a few days. I have to talk to a few girls who can barely write out their names and try to help them through the process. I don't remember prison being so full of uneducated women. It makes me sad." Alex ran her hands through Piper's hair and massaged her scalp.

"You're doing great, babe. You deserve some time off. You're starting to walk around like a zombie." Piper leaned her head back and Alex met her lips for a deep kiss. Alex's hands began to wander around Piper's waist and up to her breasts. She caught her fingers at the edges of the t-shirt and slowly pulled it off, letting Piper's hair cascade down her naked back. Alex's hands moved to the small of Piper's back and expertly massaged. "You're tense, Pipes. I can feel it here," she pressed against a tight muscle in her back, "and here," she moved her hands to the front of her shoulders and rubbed. Her hands slid over Piper's breasts again, down her stomach and between her legs, applying pressure. "and here." Piper let out a whimper at her touch and arched back against Alex. Alex applied more pressure and felt wet heat against her fingers. She slid her fingers under the band of Piper's shorts and pulled them down, lifting her a bit to slide them under her butt. Piper kicked them away. Alex wrapped her long legs around Piper's waist and licked a trail from her neck to her collarbone. She rubbed gently at the bottom of the v created by Piper's panties, teasing.

"Alex...the food." Alex didn't move her hand away but released some pressure.

"Fuck the food. I want to taste you." Alex pushed her hand down Piper's panties and slightly opened her up to feel how wet she was.

"You're ready for me...come on baby." Alex's voice sounded pained, full of wanting. Piper grabbed her hand and pulled it out of her panties. Alex made a noise of protest but let her.

"Okay. Let's go see if the food isn't ruined yet." She left Piper on the bed, half naked and breathing hard. She threw the t-shirt back over her head, forgetting the shorts and followed after Alex to the kitchen. Alex was sipping at the sauce from the pot of mussels.

"You know, they say mussels are an aphrodisiac." Alex's back was stiff and she didn't reply. Piper moved behind her and hugged her around the waist. "What?" Alex turned around and stared into her eyes.

"What? Seriously? Piper...you've been teasing me for weeks like this. You get all into it and then bail just when we're starting to get hot. What's the problem? I know you fucking want it. I just felt how wet you are. Are you trying to kill me?" Her voice sounded serious. Low and quiet. Piper wasn't sure what to say.

"We had sex like...four days ago, Alex." Alex sighed and leaned over the stove.

" _We_ , did not have sex. I fucked you and you fell asleep in my arms." Piper bit her lip nervously.

"I've been tired. I'm sorry." She reached out to pull Alex's hair behind her ear but Alex moved away from her.

"What's going on? Are you still punishing me for last year? Jesus, I thought we were past all that. It was one fucking mistake. You were supposed to be helping me stay away from the drugs, Piper. You said you would fucking help me and then you left. You always fucking leave when shit gets too heavy. So yeah...I fucked a random chick from a bar, high out of my mind, because you weren't fucking there." Piper stared at her in disbelief.

"You're seriously going to blame me for your fuck up? I told you I would leave if you started using. I kept you as far away from temptation as I could Alex. You are a self destructive. I never agreed to be your fucking babysitter. That was your fault. And fuck you for even thinking about blaming me. Fuck your food. I'm going to bed."


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Piper opened her eyes to darkness. She squinted at the clock in the corner of the room, 4am. She reached out to the other side of the bed and found it empty. Her first reaction was panic. For a year she had to live with waking up in a panic and wondering where Alex was in the early morning. She always came home looking like shit, but sober. Piper never questioned her when Alex explained that she just needed to get out and breathe. Until that night. Piper shook her head to try to get the images to flee but, there they were. The knock on the door at 4am. The gorgeous beauty standing in the doorway, trying her best to hold Alex up.

"She got pretty fucked up tonight...I'm sorry. She told me where she lived and that you'd be home. I dunno if she's okay. You should maybe take her to the hospital." Piper remembered the numb feeling of betrayal before she even asked the question.

"Who are you?" The beauty blinked and shook her head.

"Jen. We did some x tonight and a few bumps. I had to get ready for work and she was still passed out on my bed." She had kind of dropped Alex into Piper's very tired arms and almost fell, and then walked away. Piper stood in the doorway, trying to process everything before she realized that Alex was breathing very shallow, too shallow. She did her best to drag her to the couch and slap her face a few times. No response. She had no choice but to call for an ambulance. Her temperature was over 120 and they had to knock her out and put her in an ice bath at the hospital. But her heart was strong and never stopped beating. It was a long fucking night.

They didn't talk about it for almost two days. Piper tried to calm her emotions before grilling her. Alex's answers were blurry and full of half truths.

"I just ended up at the club", "I wanted to dance", "She bought me a drink." etc. Piper had sat and listened for a good half hour to all the excuses and apologies, calm and quiet. Then Alex decided to close with, "I needed you...and you were off playing fucking hero at the office, helping other women get out of their private hell, while your girlfriend was home needing you. You didn't even pick up the fucking phone Piper. I called you like 5 times." Piper couldn't listen to any more. She got up, packed a bag and got a hotel room for the next two nights.

She realized, sitting in the smoke stale hotel room that Alex didn't say anything about hooking up with this "Jen" person. This made her start to cry. She drank that night, bought a bottle of wine and drank the whole thing. It felt good to not have to watch herself around Alex. She could imbibe here in solitude. However, she did decide to call Alex that night, drunk out of her mind and ask her the question her jealous little mind really wanted an answer to. Her fingers hit the buttons on the phone in a sloppy mess.

Alex answered the phone quickly, after the first ring.

"Pipes? Baby is that you?" She sounded like she had been crying as well but, very sober. This made Piper squirm a bit, trying to find a way to steady her speech and flatten out the slurs. She managed a convincing,

"Yes."

"Baby, please come home. This isn't something that needs to break us. We can talk though it...please." Piper hated to hear Alex beg. It was like listening to your father cry. It just didn't feel right. It was uncomfortable.

"Didjou fuck her, Alex?" The slur was heavy and Piper pulled at her hair with her head down in shame.

"You're fucking drunk." It definitely wasn't a question.

"Did...you?" Piper closed her eyes tightly and waited. It seemed like hours before Alex let out a long breath into the phone.

"Piper, I don't want to do this on the phone. Please come back and we can talk about this like adults, after you've sobered up." Piper couldn't control her laugh. She laughed hard and sharp.

"You're going to dare mention thword sober to me, Miss Vause? Did you fuck her!?" She yelled into the phone in a voice she didn't recognize as her own.

"Yes, I fucked her. She fucked me. We fucked. Are you happy?" Piper didn't say anything. They both were silent for a long time, listening to each other breathe on the other end. They were so close yet so far away. Piper hung up the phone.

Piper had gone home the next day, making sure Alex was gone, on her way to work. She wandered around their loft. It was the first thing they bought once they got out of prison. There were no questions, just a knowing that they would be living together and sharing their lives together. Piper's brother, Cal, had loaned her a large sum of money to get her on her feet. It was damn sweet of him. The loft was huge. It should have belonged to the cliche urban painter or recluse writer. But, it was theirs. Piper fell into their king sized bed and wrapped herself in the blankets, smelling Alex's faint sweat mingled with the lavender oil they would sprinkle on the sheets before bed.

Somehow they were able to sit down on the overstuffed couch when Alex got home and actually talk. They talked about everything and they decided that a fuck up was bound to happen and that they were both in the wrong in various ways. And no, Piper never really forgave Alex for fucking a random chick from a bar, just like Alex never forgave Piper all those years ago for leaving her when her mother died.

Now, almost a year after the whole mess, Piper was again sitting, waiting for Alex in the early hours of morning. They fought, so was Alex out getting high or drunk? She'd been sober ever since the night she almost died. Piper started to pick up her cell when she heard light snoring coming from the couch. She walked over silently in bare feet to find Alex curled on the couch. She instantly felt a pang of guilt as she took the patchwork quilt from the back of the couch and covered her with it. Her head filled with the idea of waking Alex up and apologizing for acting like a child. Then she got another idea. She carefully lifted the quilt off Alex and neatly folded it. She walked around to the front of the couch, bending down to gently stroke her cheek. She didn't stir. Alex's long legs were curled tightly into a fetal position so she could fit on the small, perfect to cuddle in couch. Piper slowly uncurled them. Alex stirred enough to let out a groan and flop onto her back, perfect. She was wearing a pair of black boy shorts and white tank top. Her nipples were hard from the draft that always seems to linger in a giant space, no matter how hot it was. Piper leaned down to one of her nipples and sucked at it over her shirt. A tiny moan slipped between her half parted lips. Piper realized that she wasn't doing this just to appease Alex. She was doing it because she had a deep ache inside her. Alex was right, it had been way too long. She craved to be inside her now, needed it. Her hand moved down between Alex's legs and under her shorts. She let her fingers play and get lost in the perfectly groomed hair, just above her clit. She pulled her hand out to quickly moisten her finger with the wetness of her mouth and returned it under, finding her clit and gently rubbing it. Alex squirmed on the couch, more noises escaping between her lips. Piper didn't wan her to be asleep anymore. She kissed her deeply on the mouth, waiting for those piercing green eyes to flutter open. They soon did. Alex moved her arms up and pushed Piper away.

"What are you..." Piper covered her mouth with the palm of her hand and shook her head.

"Listen to me. I want you. Maybe I'm mad at you and maybe I've been a bitch but I've never stopped wanting you. So let me have you." Piper felt Alex relax a bit. "So wake up and come into bed with me." Alex did as she was told.

Alex pulled off her own clothes and threw them into the ever growing pile on the floor. She lay on the bed without a hint of vulnerability or modesty. Why should she? She was a goddess in the flesh. Piper let her eyes follow the length of her body slowly, taking it all it. How long had it been since she saw Alex fully nude? She didn't know. Her tiny body crawled onto Alex's, covering her with herself. Alex pulled her shirt up and off so their skin collided in a warm state of bliss. Piper moved to quickly pull off her own panties, and back to straddle one of Alex's powerful thighs. Alex lifted an eyebrow as Piper started to move up and down her thigh, feeling her wetness glide over her flesh. She blessed Piper with a slight smile and they kissed deeply.

Piper broke the kiss and slid down Alex's body, kissing her breasts, her stomach, the sharp bones of her hips and slowly down her inner thighs. She opened Alex's legs wide and pushed them up at the knee. She kissed her pussy like she kissed her mouth, deep and long. Her tongue dipped inside her and sucked at the already present wetness, letting it cover her tongue and slide down her throat. Alex moaned deeply and softly said

"Piper...I love you." Piper answered her with a moan into her pussy and squeezed her waist in a kind of hug. She continued to lick deeply inside her, finding her clit and moving back down inside her in long, slow strokes of her tongue. Alex tangled her fingers in Piper's hair, moving her hips against her lips, wanting her tongue deeper inside. Piper stopped suddenly and moved so their lips could touch but her hand was still free to rub at Alex's throbbing clit. Their mouths met now in a fever of tongues and teeth. Piper entered her roughly with two fingers to hear that deep gasp she craved from Alex.

"Mm, damn baby." Alex said after her gasp. This pushed Piper to dive deeper inside Alex, moving her fingers quickly inside her, easily finding the spot inside where they fit perfectly and drove Alex crazy. She moved her fingers back and forth inside her hard, sucking at her nipples, listening to Alex begin to moan her name, rocking to the rhythm Piper kept inside her. When her mouth was free, she moved her lips to Alex's ear and whispered,

"I love you too, Alex. Now I need you to come for me." Alex closed her eyes and tilted her head back. Piper sucked at her neck and the hollow of her throat, leaving red marks all over, not caring. She slid another finger inside of her and felt the instant tightness around her fingers. Alex's body began to shake and inside, her walls began to clench tightly against her fingers. Her hips raised up in the air, taking Piper's hand with her, as the height of her orgasm fell silently out of her open mouth. She slowly lowered her hips, breathing heavily. Sweat beaded in between her breasts and at her brow. Piper licked it away, salty and clean. She then brought her fingers, dripping with Alex's come to her lips and sucked at them before bringing them to Alex's mouth. Alex sucked at her own juices and their mouths met again.

They lay in silence, wrapped up in each others arms. Piper played with Alex's hair as Alex stroked her spine gently. When Alex began to massage Piper's breasts and pinch at her nipples she stopped her.

"No. That was supposed to be just for you. And I'm pretty sure I already came just from touching you. Just hold me like this and sleep with me." Alex pulled the soft blankets around their naked bodies and did just that.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Alex was awake early the next morning, fixing omelets and squeezing fresh orange juice. She had music playing softly and hummed along. She felt happy, even though she was feeling guilty about everything that had happened. She thought about it all the time. The biggest fuck up of her life was finally hurting Piper one too many times. She knew that she would never be forgive fully. A cloud of distrust and jealousy would always hang in the air for as long as they were together. Last night had been amazing and it was so good to feel wanted by Piper again. She hoped that it would last.

Piper woke to a shade of yellow covering her eyes. Her hair was a mess. She smiled at the thought of last night and hugged the pillow next to her, smelling Alex's spicy scent. Her nostrils flared a bit catching a whiff of onions and green peppers being sauteed in butter.

"That smells amazing, babe. Is that for me?" Alex poked her head around the corner of the half wall and nodded with a smirk.

"It's almost done." She was at the edge of the bed with two long strides of her long, elegant legs. She wore nothing but a white tank top and a pair of tight black boy shorts. She bent down and kissed Piper quickly and then went back to the kitchen.

Piper stretched her legs out in bed and ran her hands through her hair. She didn't want to get up. She wanted to stay in the soft nest of blankets and not worry about the realities of the day. Her head was pounding a bit and she realized that she was nervous, almost to the point of panic. She held her hands out in front of her and found them shaking. Her heart was beating in her ears.

"Hey Pipes, you didn't fall back to sleep did you?" Alex called. Piper could hear her setting down plates and glasses onto the table. She pulled on a random t-shirt and went out to the table. Alex raised an eyebrow when she sat down. Piper wasn't making eye contact.

"What?" Piper finally looked up and into those green eyes that could speak languages she'd never understand.

"Nothing. This looks amazing. Thanks babe." Piper dived into her omelet so that she didn't have to say any more. Alex sipped on her glass of orange juice, staring at her.

"Well...last night was...interesting." Piper added another bite to her mouth and nodded. Alex tilted her head, still staring. She reached across the table and lifted Piper's head with the tip of her index finger.

"What is going on? Are we seriously going to sit here and do this? I know you're still pissed so just fucking say what's on your mind...seriously." She didn't let go of Piper's chin until their eyes met. Alex looked into the abyss of blue ocean that were Piper's eyes. They were glassy. She was going to cry. Alex let go of her chin and sat back down in her chair, arms folded, waiting.

Piper put her fork down on the plate and took a drink of orange juice. She met Alex's eyes as a tear fell from hers.

"We're not okay."

"And?" Alex's voice sounded calm, almost bored.

"And...I don't know what to do about it. I haven't known what to do about for over a year." Alex rolled her eyes lazily and sighed.

"Well you could have started by not pretending like everything was fine when it's not. You always fucking do that and I never know what to expect from you. One day we're fine and the next you're laying shit like this on the table. It's hard to keep up." Piper bit her lip.

"It's hard for me too, you know? Did you think that a year passing would be enough time for me to get over what you did to me? That everything would just fall back into place like magic? Jesus Alex, it's not something that's just going to go away." Piper gulped down the rest of her juice.

"I never said it was going to go away. I thought that we'd talked and figured shit out and were moving on. I didn't even care that you were going to punish me for the rest of my life with the whole fucking sex thing. I love you and I know you love me so...why are we still having this same conversation over and over?" Alex grabbed her plate and threw it into the sink. She gripped the edge of the counter until her knuckles turned white. Her shoulders tensed up, her right hand let go of it's grip on the counter and balled up into a fist. She punched the wall once, hard. Piper fought the urge to make sure she was okay. She saw Alex shake her hand and slowly move her fingers, making sure everything still moved.

"So we're throwing things and punching walls? Is that the plan for the day?" Alex turned and stalked over to Piper. Piper saw her hand was red and had two small cuts. She glanced at the white tiles behind the sink and saw little streaks of blood. She flinched when Alex got close and picked up her plate with the half eaten omelet and her empty glass. Alex noticed the flinch. She calmly set the dishes back on the table and looked at Piper.

"Are you fucking kidding me? What...you're scared of me now? I'm not going to fucking hit you Piper." Piper picked up her own dishes and set them in the sink.

"Yeah? And how the fuck would I be sure of that Alex? Because like everything else, it's something you would never do? I think we can both agree that's fucking bullshit. But hey, that's just another fucking problem swept under the floor by me right? I'm such a fucking idiot. You're right. I am all over the place and I let the shit you do to me roll off my back when it's happening. I'm not sorry for that Alex because the shit you do to me is fucked up." Piper went to the bathroom and slammed the door shut. Alex stood beside the table, taking off her glasses and pulling her hair back with them on the top of her head. She ran her hands under cool water from the sink and dried them on a black towel. The shower turned on in the bathroom. She looked at her hand and saw it starting to show signs of bruising and her middle knuckle was abnormally large. She shook her head at herself. A vision of herself, pushing Piper against the hall door and slapping her, flashed in her head.

"So fucked up." She said to herself. She walked to the bathroom door, knocked and opened it. Piper was kneeling in the shower, quietly sobbing. Alex put her hand on the glass shower door and wiped away the condensation.

"Pipes...baby. Don't give up on us. Shit is fucked...I know that, but we can make it. I love you so much." Alex opened the door. She started to take off her clothes when she noticed a thin pink line mingling with the water. Piper had a razor clutched in one hand. She was shaking.

"Jesus, what the fuck!" Alex grabbed Piper's hand and clawed the razor from it. She threw it behind her. Piper was rocking on her heels, crying. Alex started lifting her arms, looking for the wound. There was nothing on her wrists.

"What the fuck did you do, Piper? Where did you cut yourself?" Piper didn't answer her. Alex picked her up and carried her out of the shower and onto the floor. She saw blood running down her leg. She got a towel and dabbed at the blood until she could see where it was coming from. Piper had made a long, but relatively shallow slice down her inner thigh. Alex held the towel in place firmly and waited for it to stop bleeding.

"Baby? Talk to me please. Tell me you're alright." Piper was still rocking herself back and forth, almost in a trance. She looked at Alex for a long time but there was no emotion in her eyes.

"I can't do this anymore, Alex. It hurts."


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

Alex grabbed her robe from the back of the door and put it around Piper's shoulders. She carefully lifted Piper into her arms. Alex winced when she felt how light Piper was. She had dropped down to 100lbs and her hips were sharp. She could feel her ribs and spine through the thick robe. She put Piper into bed and quickly ran back to the bathroom to grab bandage and ointment from under the sink. She paused for a moment and opened the medicine cabinet. Prescription bottles took up an entire shelf. She fumbled through them, all labeled Chapman, Piper, until she found her klonopin. She fished out 2 tablets with her long fingers and filled a glass with water from the tap. Piper's eyes were open when Alex went back into the bedroom but she was staring at nothing. Alex sat at the edge of the bed and pulled her into a half sitting position.

"Pipes? Baby take these for me." Piper held out her hand for the pills and swallowed them before Alex could offer her the water. Piper slumped back down onto her pillow and closed her eyes. Alex went to work with the bandages. She used a large piece of gauze, kept in place with a few strips of medical tape after spreading a line of ointment on. The gauze started to show a faint pink line but Alex didn't think it would have to be changed. She pulled the blankets up around Piper and sat, listening as her quick breaths started to slow. They were eventually followed by the quiet snore that always comforted Alex through sleepless nights. She got up quietly and padded back to the bathroom, and put everything back in it's proper place. She decided to take a klonopin herself.

Piper was fast asleep when Alex returned. She moved close to her and lifted her head so that it rested on her chest. Piper's wet hair stuck to Alex's bare skin and made her itch. Piper unconciously draped her arm around Alex's waist and pulled herself closer. Alex bent her head down and kissed the top of her head. She whispered,

"What the hell are we doing, Pipes?" She got only silence in reply. She fluffed her pillow and tried to sleep.

Ales woke an hour later feeling slightly dazed. She tried to stay away from any meds that were even slightly addictive. Her head felt light. Her thoughts were fuzzy. Piper was still clinging to her waist, her head was still pressed firmly against her chest. Alex flexed her fingers and found her whole right arm full of prickly pins and needles. She ignored the sensation and pulled Piper closer. Her left hand pushed loose strands of hair behind Piper's ears and gently danced her fingers along Piper's cheek, her jawline, her chin, and her lips. She kissed her forehead as Piper opened her eyes. They didn't speak for a few minutes. They stared. Alex with her questioning eyebrows furrowed down, Piper with embarrassed eyes that would look away every few seconds. Alex played with Piper's hair some more, something that always seemed to sooth and calm her. Eventually Piper spoke.

"I'm sorry." She said it so quietly Alex barely heard her.

"Don't say you're sorry. I don't even know what that word means anymore." Piper snuggled into Alex's chest again and let out a long breathe.

"That was stupid...the shower...the fight. What are we doing? I feel like I could hate you forever and love you just as long. What does that mean, babe?" Alex gripped Piper's shoulders.

"Maybe we shouldn't do this right now. Too much. You should try to go back to sleep." Piper shook her head.

"No. I don't want it to be later. Everything gets pushed back into this fucking later black-hole and it sits there and eats at us." Alex sat up,bringing Piper with her so that both their heads rested against the headboard.

"So lets talk then. Have you been doing that...like a lot? Because I haven't seen any scars." Piper let out a halfhearted laugh.

"That's where you want to start? Okay, fine. I've done it more than once."

"Where?" Alex opened the robe and exposed Piper's naked body. Piper held out her arm and pointed to the flesh on the inside of her elbow. Alex took her arm and look in disbelief. She squinted for a moment before reaching for her glasses from the nightstand. A small patch of cross hatching, white lines came into view as her eyes came back into focus. The lines were white, raised and tender looking.

"You used to kiss me there. It always felt so good. It was my favorite. Sometimes you would flick your tongue across it and suck on it. It made my toes curl up." She let out short laugh. "I remember when you stopped. It actually made me cry. So...I started to cut there...to feel, to try to feel that sensation of bliss." Alex held back her tears. She was the master of keeping a glassy eye without allowing the tears to spill over. But she couldn't control the shakiness of her voice.

"I'm...sorry." Piper took her arm away.

"We don't say sorry, remember?" Alex nodded and fumbled for the right words to say. Instead, she reached for Piper's arm again. Piper gave it back willingly and watched as Alex brought the crook of her arm to her lips. She kissed it gently and pulled away to trace the lines with her finger. She looked up at Piper's face and saw tears streaming down it. Her beautiful, big, blue eyes were so glassy they reflected the room around them. Alex reached up and wiped away some of the tears. She held her head in her hand and pulled her face closer. Her lips kissed away more tears. Piper's quiet sobs began to lessen.

"I love you, Pipes. I don't want you to feel this...do this because of me. Tell me how to fix it. Can I? Should I let you go...again...because I'm too fucked up to love you right?" Piper shook her head.

"You can't leave me. You're...we're us. You can't leave." Alex let a tear roll down her own cheek and quickly brushed it away. "I love you Alex. I'm never going to love anyone else. You can't leave."


End file.
